Wii-U das Topen

[h4xX0r]

und e zipfelchappe- sött i de schwiiz als chaschperli relaunched werde. mit em jörg schneider wo blüblüblüblüblü seit, wenn mer d'text fürescrolled.
und natürlich mit roter chappe.

[zeromeier]

und e zipfelchappe- sött i de schwiiz als chaschperli relaunched werde. mit em jörg schneider wo blüblüblüblüblü seit, wenn mer d'text fürescrolled.
und natürlich mit roter chappe.

blüblüblüblüblüblü

[Skeletor]

ihr wüsset also scho, dass mir das spieli bi jenste spieli chönnt machä?

ich weiss nöd mal meh wiä min charakter ih dä Cod MW gheisse hät. oder im GTA. a mol, dä belic glaub im 4i.

und nei, ich wott da nöd uf dä siite vo dä nintendoheinis. ich find nur diä diskussione chli ermüedend.

[zeromeier]

-> oder im GTA. a mol, dä belic glaub im 4i.

grad im gta wird de charakter doch dütlich besser verchauft, mit hindergrund gschicht und allem drum und dra.

Aber ja, ich het gern meh Charaktertüüfi i Videospiel, viel meh.

[Skeletor]

ja guät, ich bi ehrlich. bi GTA häts mich eifach nöd interessiert, han alles wägklickt. aber ja wahr, isch sicher besser als bi anderne spieli.

bi mafia II han ichs aber viel interessanter gfunde.
aber hans wiä heiri.

[O_O]

heavy rain

da isch es guets heavy rain reviews, lises:

HEAVY RAIN
Platform: PlayStation 3

I have a problem with videogame stories. It's hard to imagine some aspect of the gaming experience that has compelled me to more vitriol than the thousands of titles that have come and gone with what the developer's assumed was quality writing. Of the handful of games that have bucked this trend, they've either suffered in terms of gameplay (Planescape Torment) or were simply glorified books with insane incoherent puzzles thrown between passages (Grim Fandango, Longest Journey).

So when David Cage compares his latest game HEAVY RAIN to the works of Stanley Kubrick and David Fincher, it's easy to be skeptical. I mean, this guy started his gaming career with Omikron and Indigo Prophecy, for all the hope that could inspire in somebody. That'd be like if Stanley Kubrick started off with Manos: Hand of Fate instead of Fear and Desire, The Killing and Paths of Glory. One shows a clear steady hand for narration and direction, a root from which the mind of a genius is clearly seen even in his early flawed works. Indigo Prophecy, on the other side, shows the mind of a deranged lunatic and possible heroin addict with delusions of grandeur.

Heavy Rain, Cage says, "has the courage to break with most of the video game rules that were established 20 years ago and are still used today by most games." And with this audacity, his brilliant brain arrives at the videogame equivalent of a choose-your-own-adventure book, only minus the presence of mind not to take itself seriously. This is a man completely unaware of just how untalented he is, who is possibly surrounded by yes men who are either themselves too idiotic to stop his indulgences or just too afraid to stand up to him.

First, let me dispel a myth about Heavy Rain. There is not a new idea contained inside this game, nothing that indicates a level of rule breaking unseen or unheard. His way to "break rules" is simply on-the-fly dialogue choosing (been done before) and injecting double, nay triple the QTE sequences. His lone apparent triumph is deciding that gaming shouldn't only be about stories where everyone kills each other, but in what is seemingly the only self-aware moment in the game (at least, I have to HOPE that was him winking at the gamers... for my sanity's sake), he destroys that standard too.

What about the graphics? This is a game where absolute realism is striven for, because the story is sobering and the theme cold. And even that's a mixed result - the characters and limited surroundings are impressively modeled, but the animation system is abysmal and the final overall impression is of a bunch of creepy automatons playing at emotion, the way an ape might imitate its master for a treat.

So there's nothing new contained in this package. But since this game is 98% plot, and David Cage was inspired by James Ellroy, it's not unfathomable that he hit it out of the park right? Fuck you, that was a rhetorical question. Did you play Indigo Prophecy? No fucking shit it's unfathomable he scored on this plot. David Cage justifies his egotism by stressing the "creative unity" of vision that is in the end result, and so I hope he doesn't mind me also blaming him for the colossal failure of vision this is.

The game centers around four characters - an FBI agent named Norman, Ethan, a father who will do anything to save his son, Madison a pair of polygonal tits who serves no purpose at all and Scott Shelby the fat private investigator whose motivations are MYSTERIOUS (and after you finish the game still make no fucking sense).

The introduction to the game is perhaps the only moment that has any impact at all, even though it's incredibly contrived. But at the time we're unaware of where the story goes, and we take it at face value. It's not a big spoiler to say Ethan is a happily married architect who on one dark day at the mall loses one of his children to a car accident. His overly excited child wanted a balloon, and while he is fumbling through all twenty six of his pockets, his kid wanders off (while he yells impotently after him). Now, don't ask me why he thought paying the goddamn balloon clown was more important than telling him to wait while he secured his kid, but hell... compared to the rest of the game's narrative problems, I'll let it slide. Because yes, that feeling of helplessness they captured while you try to fight your way through a crowd was certainly mildly palpable. That is where the praise begins and ends for this fucking disaster.

SPOILERS AHEAD





Flash forward, Ethan is divorced. His one son comes for visits. There's a serial killer on the loose who kidnaps children, drowns them and leaves their body in a remote location with an origami in their hands. Ethan, conveniently, has black outs where he wakes up next to remote locations with an origami in his hands. Clearly the killer is Ethan, right? Wrong. But there's an explanation for this, certainly? WRONG. But David Cage said there's nothing supernatural in this game so there must b-- YOU ARE FUCKING WRONG. It is never explained. Ever. Stop asking. Instead of DLC which he claimed would explain it (how he would do this, fuck if I know), you got Move support. Frankly after how bad the storyline turned out, maybe some explanations are best left unsaid. But one can only assume the reality involved a fucked up Mayan Conspiracy and aliens and also President Obama somehow.

In any event, Ethan Mar's son is kidnapped by the totally-not-Ethan-trust-me-guys-all-these-red-herrings-are-leading-somewhere-Serial Killer. This shadowy figure begins to mail a series of trials which this tormented father must complete if he is to have any hope of seeing his son again. These trials include cutting off his finger, killing someone, poisoning himself, you name it, he is asked to do it!

Cut to Norman Jayden. He's investigating these serial killings. He's from the future. He has this augmented reality device which tells him exactly what is and is not a clue, exactly what these clues mean, and exactly how the clues are tied together. During the game's limpdicked investigative scenes, your job will be to stumble around extremely tiny crime scenes and press the scan button over and over the floor until the game automatically picks something up. Then Norman will make an obvious observation, the game will enter the obvious conclusion into the database, and you will smile at how rad and smart you are for playing where's waldo with blood stains. In the process you'll have to endure horrific QTE mini-games to climb muddy hills. Then later you'll have to do the same thing to drop down the muddy hill. Exhilarating!

The entire FBI side plot was clearly written by someone whose sum total of crime enforcement knowledge is four episodes of NYPD Blue and half an episode of CSI: Miami. Over and over the FBI agents and police officers make absurd mistakes and failures of judgment, leading on various occasions to the possible death of a person who isn't involved in any way to the case (where even if you kill him, nothing happens!), the wholesale ignoring of hugely obvious pieces of evidence and roughing up a psychiatrist for simply following his "oath" not to break confidentiality (even though that's also bullshit, since in cases of suspected murder it can be waived if the psychiatrist has relevant testimony).

At one moment, they're monitoring a building where Ethan is. One character enters the building on a motorcycle which all the police clearly see and helps Ethan escape (why the building wasn't surrounded, who knows!), and of course they never think to detain the motorcycle to run plates or anything. Later on the police corner Ethan at a hotel and chase him from room to room and onto the roof. How does Ethan escape? He does a bunny hop off the roof and in front of the police helicopter hijacks a taxi. No one pursues him. Let me emphasize this. He escapes an entire force of police including a police helicopter by committing another crime in front of an aerial unit and still escapes with no one in pursuit. Yeah. Fucking christ.

The list literally goes on and on. I could not write a long enough review to point out every fucked up bit of logic that went into the writing of this game, and I haven't even got to Shelby and Madison yet.

At no point does Madison serve any purpose except to make the FBI seem even more incompetent. You'll spend your time helping her strip, escape imaginary assailants and even dress her up and put make up on her so you can strip some more. She adds no particular angle to the story except as some de facto love interest for the main character, and even that falls flat as the writing suggests they have about as much chemistry as Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez in Gigli. And later on when Madison is told the name of the serial killer she is super shocked, even though she has no fucking clue who this man is. She also does an Indiana Jones and survives a horrible fire by hopping in a refrigerator. Everybody's doing it!

And then there's good ol' Shelby. Now, fair warning, if you haven't played the game now is your chance to depart from this LIFE CHANGING Heavy Rain information. Shelby is the serial killer! In this game he spends time being a completely unreliable narrator, including scenes where you control him only later you find out he did something entirely different than what you saw. He also slaughters an entire building worth of people like it's nothing, and of course for some reason nobody notices THAT fucking crime. It's just every day shit when a private investigator feels comfortable to fucking go on a murder spree. But what about that origami shit Ethan was doing? What about it? Shelby just likes origami, that's all. Isn't that cute? Every time he killed someone, he would send these same trials to the family of the victims. For some reason, these victims never gave up this evidence to the police, even after their child was found dead. Such loving parents.




END SPOILERS

The writing is consistently terrible, with the dialogue in particular being jarring and unconvincing at virtually every level. None of these characters are believable for any moment in this game. The catastrophically awful voice acting slaughters the atmosphere of every single scene even if the writing wasn't already doing that. In one particularly terrible scene, an american kid clearly has a french accent the entire time. In no way can anything related to the game's story ever be considered something other than abject shit, and this is one of those classic examples where if somebody is using this game to highlight the potential of gaming storylines, you can just go ahead and clock out of that conversation. It's game over.

In truth, I'm probably being overly generous with my review. It's difficult to even imagine the type of person who can make excuses for the near endless parade of failures, and yet they exist. So in the end I can only hope that one day David Cage's hubris destroys Quantic Dream, before anyone else gets the bright idea of following in his foot steps.

SCORE: 0 Stars/****

[Gurgelhals]

Braid sucks.

z'dümmste wo je gschribe hesch!

Nöd würklich. Bim Braid verhebet zwar s'Gameplay, aber de ganzi artsy fartsy Poesiealbum-Bullshit drumume schliift extrem a de Eier. Richtig hässig gmacht hätt das

D'Spieindustrie bestaht i däre Beziehig eifach zu 90% us ufblasene Möchtegerns (de Kojima, de David Cage, de Tubel wo bim Max Paine für d'Story zueständig gsi isch, usw.) und uninspirierte Langwiiler, wo Story & Charaktere halt eifach es Flickerwek us allne ihrne Lieblingsszene & -figure us ihrne Lieblingsfilm isch, ohni dass ihne dezue au nume ei einzigi eigeni Idee in Sinn cho wär (z.B. jedes Rockstar-Spieli, wo ich gspielt han).

Da lob ich mir die Entwickler, wo sich wenigschtens bewusst sind, dass sie's nöd chönnd und's entsprächend ganz bliibe lönd. Und da isch Nintendo halt ebe scho es Paradebispiel. Sie wüssed, dass sie kei tüüfgründendi Stories chönd verzehle, drum verzichtet's i de Regle druf (und wänn's es usnahmswiis mal probiered, isch s'Resultat ebefalls übelscht - Metroid Other M staht diesbezüglich ganz obe direkt näbed em ganze Kojima-Dräck, aber au einzelni Szene im Twilight Princess sind ziemlich *argh*). Am beschte isch es, wänn's eifach komplett uf "for teh lulz" (z.B. Mario & Luigi) mached, dänn chunnt's super.

Das Thema händ mer aber au scho öppe 34987938475345 mal gha...

[emP]

aber de ganzi artsy fartsy Poesiealbum-Bullshit drumume schliift extrem a de Eier. Richtig hässig gmacht hätt das

OLOL. Was müesse mer de bi de Nintnenden Spielei alles ushalte?

[O_O]

im braid isch mer de artsy fartsy seich glich gsi will ich eifach chan durelaufe und sichs uf 2 ziile beschränkt. s gameplay het me oder weniger verhebt.

limbo macht eine uf uuuhhh so deep und spilt sich scheisse und isch nach 20 minute langwillig.

[zeromeier]

heavy rain

da isch es guets heavy rain reviews, lises:

was genau isch guet da dra? dass irgend en mongo es spiel spielt, woner besser nöd söt spielä?

d'pünkt sind nöd falsch woner erwähnt, aber sie mached s'spiel wäg dem nöd so schlächt wie de möngel
das schriibt. es isch so eine wo d'uhr bimä typ im publikum vo ben hur entteckt und drum de ganz film unrealistischi
scheisse findt.

d'heavy rain charaktere sind glaubwürdiger als fasch jede charakter wo bis jetzt imene videospiel uftaucht sind.

[zwirrlibatz]

wenn ihr eifach mal alli würded d'schnorre hebe und dä Deadly Premonition spiele dänn wär allne klar woruf's achunnt und me chönnt ufmene massiv höchere niveau wiiterrede.

[zwirrlibatz]

was genau isch denn ade zelda story amix neuartig? tönt für mich immer glich. zudem isch s'Wort "Story" imä spiel wo d'charaktere nanig mal chönd rede sowieso bitz überrissä.

klar. stummfilm händ kei story. sogenannti "büecher" wo sogar dä hinderletschti totaltaub problemlos läse chan au nöd.

no was zum Red Dead Redemption: Ich find GTA ca. 237423020742307x interessanter als de 23749242478scht Mario/Zelda Titel. Ich weiss, dass GTA sich idä Grundzüg au wiederholt, aber mir gids meh, es isch erwachsner. Ich han kei Froid meh a de meischte Nintendo Titel, sie beweged mich nur no sälte vor de TV. Wenn denn spieli es Super Mario World und han froid dra.

Fakt isch ebe, dass ihr total borniert sind was GTA/COD etc. agad. mämämä, egoshooter-mischt. mir gfallt das zelda/mario züüg eifach nümä, ich het mängisch gern, es wür mich no so begeischtere wie vor 10 jahr, tuds aber nöd. Wäg dem sind die Spiel nöd schlächt, aber für mich (!) zwenig "erwachse" als dass sie mich würed inezieh chönä. d'Story & Charaktere sind mir eifach zu belanglos.

Red Dead Redemption isch für mich eis vodä beschte Spiel aller Ziitä, ghört id Top5 vo minä all-time favorits. Und ja, es isch tatsächlich Potential verschänkt wurde, trotzdem findis aber absolut fantastisch. Aber ja, mir gfallt halt d'Spielmechanik vome GTA; dir nöd.

hä? wieso gfallt mir d'gta spielmechanik nöd? lueg, me sött sich eifach entscheide öb me vo "mir gfalled x-spieli aber y-spieli nöd" rede oder ahand vo spieli- und franchisetitel eifach pauschali videospielgsetz zämelisme will. erschters easy, zweiters dumm.

edit: als schöne Kontrascht: Ich han Heavy Rain überragend gfundä, eifach wills für es Videospiel ändlich mal interessanti Charaktere und e gueti Gschicht bracht hed. mir isch min Hauptcharakter jewiils nöd egal gsii; ich find das mega; das söt d'Zuekunft sii (natürlich mitere interessantere/bessere Stüürig)

spiel deadly premonition.

[derinderinderinderin]

Nöd würklich. Bim Braid verhebet zwar s'Gameplay, aber de ganzi artsy fartsy Poesiealbum-Bullshit drumume schliift extrem a de Eier. Richtig hässig gmacht hätt das

Ig vermuete, dass du Braid nid fertig gspielt hesch, süscht hättisch vermuetlich e besseri Meinig vo dem Spiel.

Übrigens gitts nid grundlos es eigets FAQ namens "Plot Analysis".
http://www.gamefaqs.com/xbox360/943284-braid/faqs/53842

90% of the actual storyline of Braid takes place in the Epilogue.

Wenn dich das Setting agro macht isch das schad, du verpassisch öppis.

[zwirrlibatz]

Ich weiss, dass GTA sich idä Grundzüg au wiederholt, aber mir gids meh, es isch erwachsner. Ich han kei Froid meh a de meischte Nintendo Titel, sie beweged mich nur no sälte vor de TV. Wenn denn spieli es Super Mario World und han froid dra.

Fakt isch ebe, dass ihr total borniert sind was GTA/COD etc. agad. mämämä, egoshooter-mischt. mir gfallt das zelda/mario züüg eifach nümä, ich het mängisch gern, es wür mich no so begeischtere wie vor 10 jahr, tuds aber nöd. Wäg dem sind die Spiel nöd schlächt, aber für mich (!) zwenig "erwachse" als dass sie mich würed inezieh chönä. d'Story & Charaktere sind mir eifach zu belanglos.

Was isch dänn amne GTA erwachnser als amne Zelda Spieli? Wills Pischtole und Nutte hett? Vomne 17jährige überrascht mich sone Ussag nöd aber vomne Erwachsne scho.

[Gurgelhals]

Ich hans komplett duregspielt und leider au immer brav alles gläse. Poesiealbum

Wahrschinlich sött ich so Spieli wie s'pony spiele, dänn würd's funktioniere. Ich chan aber das nöd, ich mues immer alles läse

Übrigens gitts nid grundlos es eigets FAQ namens "Plot Analysis".
http://www.gamefaqs.com/xbox360/943284-braid/faqs/53842

Wayne? Es gitt inzwüsche au akademischi Forschigsprojekt zu de Lady Gaga. Deswege isch das was sie macht no lang nöd interessant

[zwirrlibatz]

Braid sucks.

aaaaaah han ich au nume demo gspielt und stellverträtend gnoh.....

dämfall halt de The Misadventures of P.B. Winterbottom! super!

[Sephi]

Ich han Heavy Rain überragend gfundä, eifach wills für es Videospiel ändlich mal interessanti Charaktere und e gueti Gschicht bracht hed.

Sorry aber Heavy Rain het e absolut katastrophali Gschicht gha. Und das söttisch merke wenn so Wörter wie "erwachse" im Bezug ufd Story vo Nintendospieli is Muu nimmsch. Jedes Zelda het die durchdachteri, logischeri und in sich schlüssigeri Gschicht als Heavy Rain. Überhaupt - Action/Schüsse/Bluet mit "erwachse" gliichzsetze isch denn doch grad gar falsch. Ich han au Freud a GTA/Red Dead etc., aber es isch nid schwär z gseh dass die Spil zum bispil wäsentlech infantiler und weniger "erwachse" (wennme das Wort unbedingt wott bruche) sind als es Zelda oder Braid.

Edit: Ersch jetz s Review gseh wo de CJay postet het. Bringt d Gschicht und Charaktere sehr guet uf de Punkt . Ebe, gspilt und für luschtig befunde hanichs ja au, aber es isch wit devo entfärnt e besseri Gschicht als jedes x-beliebige Zelda zha oder au no "erwachsener" zsii.

[Skeletor]

hät zwar nix mit dem ztuä, aber ich han gänsehuut gha bim unterwasser hyrule uf em windwaker.
nöd mängs spieli hät das anebracht.

es fantastischs zelda, bis zur triforce suechi am schluss wo mich dermasse hässig gmacht hät.

[siralos]

[quote="zeromeier]
was genau isch denn ade zelda story amix neuartig? tönt für mich immer glich. zudem isch s'Wort "Story" imä spiel wo d'charaktere nanig mal chönd rede sowieso bitz überrissä. Wie findsch d'Story bim Super Mario amix? mega oder.[/quote]

erm die chars aus baldurs gate koennen auch nicht reden, nicht wenig story gabs da.....

[zeromeier]

das topic interessiert mich nüm.

[zwirrlibatz]

das topic interessiert mich nüm.

logisch. d'nintendonerds schlöhnd zrugg.

[zeromeier]

das topic interessiert mich nüm.

logisch. d'nintendonerds schlöhnd zrugg.

die diskussion isch mir zasträngend, nöd meh und nöd weniger.

[zwirrlibatz]

die diskussion isch mir zasträngend, nöd meh und nöd weniger.

spiel deadly premonition.

[zwirrlibatz]

hät zwar nix mit dem ztuä, aber ich han gänsehuut gha bim unterwasser hyrule uf em windwaker.

bi wiitem nöd mis lieblingszelda aber das det isch en höhepunkt i dä videospiligschicht.

[ritschi]

Ich hans komplett duregspielt und leider au immer brav alles gläse. Poesiealbum

fair, glaub det hani gar nüt gläse ha eifach z'gameplay mega gfunge.